More Proof I Am Raising Weird Kids

Those who know our family know we are nerds. We go all in for the things we love – superheroes, books, and Broadway. So, it should come as no surprise that our kids are a little bit weird. It is a weirdness we’ve nurtured and a weirdness we love.

But, there are days when we wonder if we have just totally screwed up our kids. I think every parent worries about this at some point. Rather than focusing on these big picture “am I totally ruining my kid” or “will they need years of therapy” type of concerns, I’d like to tell you some of the more funny times my husband and I have thought, “Uh-oh.”

Here are my costumed children doing the "Thriller" dance

A few weeks ago, my six-year-old son came to me all concerned about scorpions. The conversation follows:

Son: Why are scorpions so bad?

Me: Well, they are dangerous.

Son: But, why are they so dangerous?

Me: Because they can hurt you and they are scary.

Son: Is that why people don’t like them?

Me: Yes.

Son: But, are they really evil guys?

Me: What?

Son: Are they really evil guys?

Me: What are you talking about?

Son: The guys that the other guys with the car are racing in that singing movie – The Scorpions!

Me: Oh, you were talking about the movie Grease and not the creature.

My six-year-old son did not know scorpions were real creatures. He only thought scorpions were the bad guys in the movie Grease. Is this a #momwin or #momfail? We’ll have to wait a few years to see how he turns out.

On top of this musical gaffe, our kids are also clueless about sports. CLUELESS. My husband was an all-star athlete. He was phenomenal. Seriously. If only he didn’t have stupid knees… 

However, we have not pushed the whole kids play sports thing. We are more of the “if they show interest, then sure” mindset. So far, little to no interest in sports.

Which is why the following had us falling all over each other laughing after the kids went to bed.

Son: We took a stroll at kids church through the cemetery and the bull pit today. But, there weren’t any bulls. Where do they keep the bulls at church mom?

Me: What? Bulls?

Son: You know for the bull pit. There aren’t any bulls there now. But where would they be?

Me: Knox, there are no bulls at the church. There is no bull pit.

Son: Yes, there is. I saw it. The grass is overgrown and there is some dirt and there is a fence to keep the bulls in.

Me: Knox, there is not a bull pit. There is a baseball field, so you might have heard ball pit. There is also a bullpen, but that doesn’t mean bulls, it is something to do with baseball.

Son: No. It is for bulls. There is only one bench. For sports games, you have to have a lot of benches.

Me: I give up.

Son: I ran all around shouting "Ole!"

He’s a smart kid in a very unique way. Bless his heart.

But, I have no doubt that his interesting way of looking at the world will take him far. And, I am just thrilled to be along for the ride.